To Have Loved And Lost
by twerri02
Summary: Damon screwed up so the witches got their revenge by binding him in a never-ending curse. Because of this curse, he was forced to stay away from the one person that he truly loved, otherwise kills her. Now she has returned and making it very difficult for Damon to stay away from her.
1. Prologue

**PROLOGUE**

"I'll see you too lovebirds" I teased the happy couple now making their way to0wards the door.

Before leaving, Elena turned back to me and called out, "Bye Damon" she said but hastily added, try not to kill anyone" she then laughed at her own joke and I rolled my eyes.

If anyone needed their control checked, it was the serial killer she was now cosying up to. I watched them disappear out of the room, heading to school like normal puppy-loved up teenagers while leaving me to sort out their mess.

Today's mess included my ex-vampire-girlfriend who was now raking havoc in mystic Falls by leaving me to deal with a particular blonde dealing with 90210 drama and her new fangs. Aside from that, I also had to deal with the mystery of the Lockwood family and search for wolf repellent.

So far, there was no progress on either problem, and having my brother and his girlfriend shacking up didn't exactly speed things along.

We wouldn't even have the first problem if they would have just let me stake her. What's another head cheerleader to the world?

With a sigh, I turned back to the riveting tales of 'Legends of Shape-shifters' while trying hard not to sleep and to try to concentrate. This became increasingly difficult so I even went as far as welcoming the distraction of Sabrina the teen witch walking through the door. "Is Elena here?" she asked, "She asked me to pick her up" she added and glanced around the room, taking another step towards me.

"Well that's gonna be difficult seeing as she left with Stefan" I replied and tied focusing again on the nonsensical words before me.

The quiet was interrupted by the loud ping of her phone and I watched as Bonnie checked her phone. "A little late for that" she murmured, probably having gotten a text from Elena. "Anyway, I'm gonna go" she sighed, most likely irritated and turned to leave.

"See you later Bennett" I called out but the only reply was the slam of the door.

Once she was gone, I looked back to the book and tried to make sense of the symbols now sketched in along with a strange script. It was probably Latin…maybe f-

The travelling thought was disrupted with Bonnie's reappearance. "She's coming" she rasped out with a newly soreness in her throat.

I glanced up to see her stumbling further into the room, her lips now forming strange witchy language as she approached me. I recalled the words she had begun with and I frowned, "Who? Elena?" I asked impatiently, not really caring for the childish tiffs.

However, the little Bennett witch was still shrouded by the darkness and I briefly wondered how I hadn't hear her come in. "She is coming" she repeated and the shadows fell from her with the next step. It was then that I noticed how her usual bright green eyes had darkened to strange moss green. There was something ominous within the blank stare and bizarre with how her pupils dilated as she fell into some kind of trance. "She is coming" she recited again, her voice how deeper and I threw the book down, standing up to brace myself.

"Bonnie…?" I asked, the worry seeping into my voice as I felt something nudge within me, trying to warn me but I couldn't seem to understand what it was…or maybe I just didn't want to.

"She is coming"

I wanted – no, needed to shake her out of it.

I couldn't help but hate the words coming out of her mouth because I suddenly knew what they meant. I didn't want to hear her remind me again but the chant kept leaving her.

As I previously wanted to do, my hands gripped Bonnie's shoulders and shook her fiercely. It didn't take long because her form slumped into my arms after drawing out her last breath.

"Bonnie?" I called out calmly, in spite of how hart my heart thundered and how my breaths had sharpened. "Bonnie?" I asked again and exhaled when I heard her simper.

After a few seconds, her eyelids fluttered open and she blinked up to me. "Damon?" she asked and I was relieved to find her eyes and voice were back to normal. "What happened? What did I say?" she asked, clearly having forgotten the warning.

…but I couldn't – not even if I wanted.

"Nothing" I shook my head and helped her to her feet. "Nothing" I repeated and numbly turned back to the book. This time actually hoping that the words would send me into a soundless sleep.

**A/N: What just happened and who is Bonnie talking about? **

**More importantly, should I carry on…**


	2. The Barbecue

**THE BARBECUE**

**A/N: Thank you so much for leaving wonderful reviews that let me know you were interested and wanted more. Here's another to fulfil your wish…**

I waited at the bar, drumming my fingers on the counter as I grew more and more impatient. The waitress had disappeared into the kitchen and was yet to come back. For what felt like the hundrenth time, I checked my phone and groaned.

"Didn't expect to see you up this early"

I turned and plastered on a smile. "Elena" I greeted her with a short passive nod. "Don't you have school to get to?" I wondered and she frowned.

"It's Saturday" she informed me, leaning against the counter and staring down at me.

Thankfully, at that moment the waitress appeared and brought it out in a cardboard white box. "Here's your pie" she offered and I accepted it with a forced smile.

"Pie?" Elena arched an eyebrow in speculation.

"For Jenna's barbecue" I clarified and made a move to walk out but she was quick to stand in front of me, blocking my path.

She crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her gaze. "Where did you hear about that?" she questioned and I rolled my eyes at her need for drama.

"Through the grapevines" I teased and tried to sidestep her again.

However, she blocked my path again and glared, "Damon…" she cautioned.

"She likes blueberry, right?" I checked, holding up the box.

"You can't come" she argued, shaking her head.

Suddenly my anger flared up at her attempt at ordering me around. "Too bad" I snapped, finding no amusement in the situation. It was becoming increasingly difficult to withhold my rage because all I could think about was Bonnie and her stupid chant.

"Are you okay?" Elena wondered, noticing my silence and curt tone.

I sighed in aggravation and diverted my eyes. "Why?"

"You just seem…" she trailed off

After glimpsing at her once more, I sighed, "I'm fine" I promised and hastily walked around her. "See you at the barbecue"

**-XxxxxX-**

"Damon, what an unpleasant surprise" Jenna sulked when opening the door.

I grinned, "Nice to see you too Jenna" I replied, keeping my voice light and the Salvatore-charm smile on my face as I tried another tactic. "You're looking beautiful as always" I grinned and waited for her to invite me in.

"I'm taken" she reminded me.

I waved it off, "And I'm just trying to be nice" I argued and held out the pie, "Make peace?" I offered and smiled secretively when watching her waver.

"What kind?" she mused, pursing her lips with interest.

"Blueberry" I answered.

Finally her attempt at being strong failed as she dropped the hand from the doorway and complied, "Fine." She sighed dismissively and took a step back. "You can come in" she complied and snatched the pie out of my hands.

"Hey man" Alaric came up from behind her and shook my hand. "You okay?" he inquired dubiously, looking at me with concern and pity – which I hated.

"Why is everyone asking that?" I sighed irritably and walked away from him as I followed Jenna into the kitchen.

Ric, as always, was relentless when silently studying me, "There's just something…" he murmured thoughtfully, quickening his pace to keep up with me.

"Guess I'm just tired" I answered dismissively. Regardless of trying to get him to shut up, I knew that it wasn't a complete lie. The night was spent thinking over what was going to happen and how SHE would return in my life as well as how SHE would be taken away.

Well, one thing was certain; I could not let it happen.

Just as that was decided, the doorbell rang and Jenna turned around, smiling. "That must be Mason" she announced and I smiled, remembering our guest of honour.

"Lockwood right?" I recounted.

She nodded with a tight-lipped smile, "Right" she answered and briskly walked past me so she could leave the kitchen to answer the door.

Once she was absent, Ric turned to me and asked, "So what's the plan?"

"What plan? There is no plan" I shrugged him off and playfully walked around the counter.

He followed after me and grabbed my shoulder, pulling me back. "I know you have a plan" he persisted.

"Well…" I drawled out and looked around the kitchen before smiling, "…it may involve a silver steak knife" I replied, gesturing towards the cutlery set out.

"You're going to try and out him" he guessed.

I wagged a finger towards him and nodded in approval. "Smart man"

"Couldn't get a keg but I hope this will do"

We snapped our heads up at the sound of the new voice echoed through.

"Well your six pack is always appreciated" I heard Jenna reply and giggle at her own joke before both of them emerged at the doorway. "Hey, um, this is Mason" she introduced.

I made the first move and offered my hand, "Hey, Damon Salvatore" I greeted him, the charade returning as my mask was firmly back in place.

"Nice to meet you" he replied and shook my hand.

I withdrew my hand and nodded in agreement. "You too" I replied and got tired of smiling so I added, "I'm sorry about your brother"

"Thanks" he smiled sadly and I tried to identify any signs of him lying. I was usually pretty good at it but it was difficult with him. If I didn't know better, I would've guessed that he had n0thing to hide.

Just as I was about to carry on with the charade, the world suddenly seemed to stop when someone else's voice called out, "Hey Mase…"

My breath was caught in my throat and no matter how hard I tried to fight away the idea of her materialising away, she appeared. Right there, standing on the doorway and with everything that I knew, she simply waved, "Hey" she greeted us and that smile that I loved and knew so well spread across her pink lips. "I'm Bella"

I know.

**A/N: So, Bonnie's premonition came true…? What will this lead to? **


	3. The Nostalgia

**THE NOSTALGIA**

**-FLASHBACK-**

**"Tell me!" I growled and spun around to glare at her. **

**She continued to play off her innocence while picking at the herbs in the garden. Her legs were tucked beneath her and her hair was wrapped up in a bun as she adorned an air of calm. **

**How dare she?**

**Placing my hands on my hips, I stormed over to her and fought the rage that drove me into temptation of roughly grabbing her hair and yanking her back. "Tell me now and I may just spare your life" I offered and waited for her to turn to me. **

**"It will do you great good if you stay away from Katerina" she warned again but I rolled my eyes, tired of the same caution. "She is nothing but good news" Emily added and pushed a stray lock behind her ear before pushing herself up from the ground. Her hands reached down to brush the dirt from her dress but I whipped out and grabbed her wrist. **

**"I am running out of patience and control" I snarled angrily and waited for her to flinch but she disappointed me. "…so I suggest that it is in your best interest to not push me" I threatened once again but she slowly unwound her hand away from me. **

**She finally looked up to me and this time, her taciturn expression hardened as she coldly replied. "You don't deserve love" she revealed and I hissed in frustration. "For what I know you will surely do, you will suffer great consequences" Emily cautioned and before I could reply, her incoherent chanting began. **

**Whatever else she was going to say was interrupted when my fingers applied pressute against her neck, snapping it and finally silencing her. **

**-FLASHBACK END-**

Witches' bodies need to be at peace; somewhere where they could finally rest but my anger had gotten the best of me. After Emily, her trailing bloodline followed and I didn't stop with the Bennett ancestry line as I fell into other family trees.

Only, it was that one night with Emily that haunted me. It reminded me of my first lesson of not pissing the witches off.

Every day, I never failed to think about it and how it had all too quickly bit me on the ass. This was now relived as for the millionth time today, my gaze flickered up to the all too captivating brunette. It worsened as I watched her beautiful features brighten when she threw her head back in pleasured laughter. The bells like tone of her laughs trailing through the room but all it did was remind me of how ticklish she was, especially when done at the back of her thigh.

When I caught the shift in her gaze, I hastily dropped my head and went back to what I had been doing for the past hour. Simply eating quietly and allowing them to continue the conversation while offering low hums and mumbles of agreement.

Only my attempt at keeping quiet was unavoidable when the girl who I had held in my arms while she gave her last breath, captured my attention again. "So, Damon was it?" she asked and I simply hummed in response before diverting my gaze. All the while, hating how easy it was for the memories to return, especially with the sound of her voice. "What do you do?" she asked.

"Ride out my trust fund" I teased with an easy smirk which she mirrored.

Her interest and sense of humour was reminded as she leaned in slightly and smiled. "Old money?" she guessed and the familiar glimmer, give light to the hazel wisps that curled within the warm chocolate brown.

"I suppose so" I agreed and used my fork to stab at the piece of cheesed pasta. "What about you?" I found myself asking and wondering if she had changed from the last time we were kind of together.

My attempt at trying seemed to please her because het grin widened. "I write…" she answered.

"Anything I've read?" I arched an eyebrow and silently laughed to myself knowing that I had over a thousand of her notes and her unfinished pieces up in my room.

She shook her head with a wry smile and the return of her delicious blush had me stifling a groan. "Probably not" she argued bashfully and ducked her head as she hesitantly wrapped her pearl fingers around the silver fork before lifting it. Her small pink tongue darted out before she parted her lips and wrapped them around the silver. I watched in fascination as each familiar but somehow new action left me fixated and insatiable.

Before I could interrogate her further, one hand was wrapped around her shoulders and a kiss from another man was placed on her flustered cheek. "She's being modest" the guy I was supposed to be watching spoke for her and I dropped my cutlery to stop myself from bending the metal. "She actually published a few poems and various articles" he informed me and I hated that I had to hear this from the wolf.

"A published writer?" Jenna exclaimed with great pride and clearly entertained by this. "Aren't I lucky to have someone famous on my table?" she added and I caught hoe Bella rolled her eyes.

She turned her attention towards her and waved off the appraisal. Her cheeks flushed again as the blood pooled within them from the natural embarrassment. The only time I could recall her confidence was when we were alone together.

"Please, don't get ahead of yourself" Isabella argued with a wave of her hand. "Covering school sports and a few parades doesn't count as a published writer" she corrected and this time, it was my turn to roll my eyes at her shyness.

"And the poems…?" Ric joined in. He had finally grown tired of simply watching

"There were only two and both were for a school competition"

"Still, first place" the Lockwood wolf reminded her, with a grin and it was almost like he wanted me to kill him with the way he continued to touch her and kiss her.

Now, my leg was bouncing as my clenched fists were pressed onto my thighs. I bit back the angered and menacing growl that threatened to fall. "Well I'm sure your big break is coming soon" I forced myself to say, earning a pleasant and genuine grin but her eyes were wide with surprise at the unexpected wish.

After a very lengthy silence with her eyes trapped onto mine as I to hers, she blushed again and dropped her head. I watched in amusement as she tried to pretend that she couldn't feel my eyes following her every move.

"Ric, could you pass the scallops t-"

"She doesn't like sea food" I snapped before Jenna could finish the sentence.

Mason moved back in his seat and arched an eyebrow. "That true?" he asked with an idiotic look on his face.

She glanced at him and then at me, allowing her surprise to filter. "Yeah actually" she nodded and slowly placed the fork down. "How did you know?" she asked and I finally realised the mistake I had made.

"I uh…saw your face when you caught sight of them" I replied and added a confident smile to not raise any suspicion. I was always had been good at climbing out of the holes that I dug for myself.

She nodded in agreement and then grimaced when chancing a glimpse towards the plate. "Bad experiences" she cringed and her nose did that same adorable thing of scrunching up with her distaste.

"That's why you hate fishing" he guessed with a smile.

He started acting stupid when pretending to be a fish and pulling her into another kiss. This time, he wouldn't let her pull away as he deepened in and I watched in disgust as his fingers coiled around those mahogany locks, cradling her close.

It was her moan that did it for me and I shot up from my seat. A bit too sharply because after thye clattering of my fork, my chair fell back, hitting the ground and the sounds alerted the happy sucking face couple. They broke apart and all of them widely stared at me with quizzical brows.

Ric's hand was placed on my shoulder as he sought me out. "Hey man, you okay?"

I didn't answer him because I had already left.

I was not going to go through this again.

**A/N: Many of you already have an idea of the curse but I hope you liked the update.**

**Love for confused and troubled Damon?**


End file.
